bah humbug

I hate Valentine's Day.

OK, granted, it is my first Valentine's as a single person in several years... but that's not the only reason I'm humbugging today.

When we're single, Valentine's just feels like "I'm a Loser Day".

When we're not single, it isn't much better....

Let me put it this way. When we were married, if Greg had gone all out with the romantic dinner and/or jewelry and/or chocolate and/or flowers--on January 27--I would have been absolutely thrilled. He would have been God's gift to women, and I would have been the lucky wife of the most romantic man on the planet!

But if Greg had done the exact same thing eighteen days later, on Val's Day.... meh. Even worse, if he dared to not do that stuff on February 14, he would have been a failure, an absolute scuzz.

Now this makes me sound like I was a shallow, demanding wife... but I'm just commenting on modern cultural expectations in general. And for the record, I think they're crap. What kind of a weird monkey dance are we putting our loved ones through?

I hereby have no expectations for any future Valentine's Day for the rest of my life. If the day is really about love, I'm going to spend it reflecting on the people that are important to me (ALL the people, not just a romantic partner), and to be thankful for them. Memo to all future lovers: no candy hearts, no diamond earrings, no teddy bears necessary on February 14! Just a kiss and an "I love you." Here's the catch, though... I need that lovin' every single day. And for real cheesecake points (I'm not huge on brownies), do the romantic dinners, sweet gifts, and general cherishin'.... ALL YEAR LONG.

Meanwhile, (at the risk of being the crazy cat lady) my Valentine this year is Zoe the putty tat.

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8 Response to "bah humbug"

  1. Anonymous Says:
    February 14, 2008 at 10:21 AM

    Please try not to feel too bad, Nayana. Think of Mary Tyler Moore:

    Who can turn the world on with her smile?
    Who can take a nothing day, and suddenly make it all seem worthwhile?
    Well it's you girl, and you should know it
    With each glance and every little movement you show it

    Love is all around, no need to waste it
    You can have a town, why don't you take it
    You're gonna make it after all
    You're gonna make it after all

    How will you make it on your own?
    This world is awfully big, girl this time you're all alone
    But it's time you started living
    It's time you let someone else do some giving

    Love is all around, no need to waste it
    You can have a town, why don't you take it
    You're gonna make it after all
    You're gonna make it after all

    That's you because your posts always make me smile.

  2. Nayana Anthony says:
    February 14, 2008 at 11:10 AM

    Marilyn.... Could you be any sweeter??? *BIG BLOGGY HUGS*

  3. Anonymous Says:
    February 14, 2008 at 4:17 PM

    Here's the thing though, why is there designated one day to show that you really love someone? Why can't we do this every day, all the time? One day of gifts and candy won't change anything if it's bad, and it won't change much if it's good either.

    I'm a very romantic guy, but personally I have no special feelings towards V-Day. yes, granted.... it does make me think of love more than usual, but it doesn't make me a more lovable guy than I already am. So to quote a classic (with minor alterations)

    V-Day, huh, good God
    What is it good for
    Absolutely nothing
    Listen to me

  4. Nayana Anthony says:
    February 14, 2008 at 4:19 PM

    EXACTLY, soundtrackgeek! Thank you for making my point. :-)

  5. Anonymous Says:
    February 14, 2008 at 7:01 PM

    My hubby just said that he wants to watch zombie movies from the 50s while holding me. Isn't that ROMANTIC!!!!

  6. David Bishop says:
    February 14, 2008 at 9:02 PM

    Is there a polar opposite of Valentine's Day? "Show the one you hate exactly how you feel" And what would be the classic Hate Day gifts? I think the candy hearts would still work because I think they are quite hated.

    In an unrelated note, I can't wait 'till you see City Lights. I would really like to have another person to talk about it with.

  7. Anonymous Says:
    February 15, 2008 at 8:16 AM

    I've seen City Lights. What do you want to talk about?

  8. Nayana Anthony says:
    February 15, 2008 at 8:43 AM

    Marilyn, that is the best kind of romantic: unconventional romantic. Good on you.

    Chris... sign me up for Hate Day. That actually sounds like fun. We could give the candy hearts and also the leftover candy corn from Halloween. And fruitcakes from Christmas.

    City Lights is on the list; you can be sure we'll have a conversation about it. :-)

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