The Center Seat

I hated high school.

It just wasn't for me. I think I'm too much of a non-conformist. As a result, I got made fun of and usually ate lunch at a table by myself, with a book to help pass the 25 minutes. I dated the choir dork (with a voice like a sick mule) and the Star Trek geek (you don't even understand--he wore Star Trek t-shirts to school every day). I did exceptionally well in my classes without really trying, which also added to my social troubles. And I was chubby. So, not a fun four years.

Watching American Teen last weekend was like sitting in the visitors' SUV at Jurassic Park if all had gone well. You sit in the comfort of your protected environment, watch the Tyrannosaurus munch on the goat, you feel a bit of empathy for the goat, but then you also thank your lucky stars that the T-Rex's paddock is electrified.

I remained in the (relative) comfort of Uptown Theatre, watching the carnage (the Tyrannosaurus in this case is blonde, athletic, and goes by the name of Megan Krizmanich), and remembered. The movie depicts a world just like mine 15-odd years ago, sans the texting, instant messaging, and other scary new ways kids can hurt each other.

I would so have been friends with Hannah Bailey in real life.

American Teen's realism is startling, but it's also a very entertaining documentary. I found myself rooting for these adolescent underdogs at least as much as I did for The King of Kong. Oh yeah, and the soundtrack kicks ass. Definitely worth seeing.

...Click here for the rest of this tasty post.

Well, don't expect to see The Visitor reviewed on The Center Seat anytime soon.

Captain Crash and I showed up to the screening a full 30 minutes early and discovered a line out the front door of Landmark's Lagoon Cinema. I'm thinking either The Visitor is hugely popular, or the screening was grossly overbooked. Anyway, we gamely got in line, and we got within three people of the box office... when they announced that it was sold out.

Here's the thing... figuring we had plenty of time (I've caught a few of these screenings before, and 30 minutes is always plenty early), we stopped at Mac & Don's Golden Rainbow Lounge for some soft serve. Those precious minutes would have gotten us seats at the Lagoon. Ugh.

The ice cream wasn't even that good. All melty. So not worth it.

I consoled myself with a Blue Moon and some quesadillas. Captain Crash finished The Village Pub's "Big @$$ Burger" and got me a free Grain Belt, too. It's all good, I guess.

...Click here for the rest of this tasty post.

Greg and I have this habit... we get together, fully intending to work together on his homework (it's a screenwriting class, and I'm a fairly fast typist), but we end up just hanging out. Watching a movie, going out to eat, whatever. You could say it's because we're lazy or procrastinators (and you probably wouldn't be too far off), but I think it may have more to do with the fact that we genuinely miss each other's company. You know, we were together for a reason... It's nice to remember the good stuff about being his friend, and not just the heartbreaking stuff.

So a few Saturdays back, we did just that... we got together to work, but just ended up going to Landmark's Edina Cinema to see The Band's Visit. (Side note: I could never get him to come see indie movies with me when we were married! What is the deal with that?)


Before seeing this movie, all I really knew about it was what I had seen on the "coming soon" posters around Landmark's theaters. I figured it would be a continuation of 2006's Oscar-winning short West Bank Story, which provided comic relief on the subject of Israeli-Palestinian tensions. I loved that movie, so I figured this one couldn't be all bad. And it wasn't... but I didn't think it was anything like West Bank Story; where that film was wildly hilarious, The Band's Visit was gently touching.

The story centers around an Egyptian (Arab) police band who visits Israel and mistakenly heads to the wrong town. You expect all kinds of crazy Arab/Israeli tension, and there's a little, but mostly the film is just about human beings passing through each other's lives for one day. Everyone in the movie seems a little lost... not just geographically, but personally.

Surprisingly, although the credits are in Hebrew and Arabic, most of the film is in English (which is why it wasn't eligible for the 2007 Academy Award category for Foreign Language Film). There are a few moments, when either the Arab or Israeli groups are alone, when Hebrew and Arabic are spoken, but English seems to be the lingua franca for the two cultures, so that's what we hear most of the time.

And, hey, some of the cinematography kicks ass (see the above still).

It's not a bad way to spend a Saturday afternoon. ...Click here for the rest of this tasty post.

Best Animated Short Film is the coolest Oscar category ever! Anyone know why? Well, aside from a lack of the usual bitchiness and intrigue that plagues many of the other awards, this is one of the few categories in which a movie-phile like me (or you) has the opportunity to sit down and watch all the nominees... in under two hours!

That's right: if you're lucky enough to have an arthouse cinema in your town (or a theater chain that passes for one, like Landmark), you can see a feature film which is just a compilation of all the nominated shorts, in either the Animated or Live Action category. I watched both, but the all-knowing, all-seeing Fletch has assigned me the Animated Shorts. So, here's the rundown, in the order in which I saw them:

Même les pigeons vont au paradis (Even Pigeons Go To Heaven) - France
This film (available on YouTube) is part silly slapstick, part dark social commentary. An enterprising priest tries to scam a feeble old man into buying a machine that will take him to heaven. The animation is exquisite and engaging. There are a few twists and a satisfying (if ironic) ending, and the film is definitely good for some hearty laughs. Underneath it all, however, there are dark themes of death, bad karma, and the masses getting screwed by religion. Of all the short films on the list, Even Pigeons is the most user-friendly, and earned the most out-loud laughter from our audience.

Moya lyubov (My Love) - Russia
The most startling thing about My Love is the animation. It was rendered with oil painting on glass, and it comes out looking like a fluid Monet painting come to life. Visually, it was stunning; honestly, though, after a few minutes, my eyes started to water. And as masterful as the animation was, the story seemed to be slapped together with Play-Doh. The film follows a teenage boy in pre-revolutionary Russia. He's yanked around by his libido: one moment, he's passionately in love with a family servant, and the next moment, he is utterly devoted to a mysterious neighbor woman. The boy lurches back and forth between the two women, and is ultimately disappointed, as neither fantasy is what he had hoped for. It is worth noting that My Love's director, Aleksandr Petrov, has been nominated three times before in this category, winning once for The Old Man and the Sea in 1999.

Madame Tutli-Putli - Canada
This short is a seamless integration of computer and stop-motion animation. We follow the title character as she takes an eerie late-night train ride with all her worldly possessions. The film starts out light and mildly funny, but it soon morphs into suspense, horror, and eventually metaphysical whacked-out-itude. Technically, it's marvelous. Madame Tutli-Putli's huge eyes alone are an animation masterpiece (according to Wikipedia, Jason Walker came up with the idea of using composited human eyes and adding them to the stop-motion puppets). The detail is amazing, from the veins in Madame's legs to the endless collection of odds and ends she hauls with her. Personally, though, I just found it gross. And weird.

I Met the Walrus - Canada
In 1969, a ballsy kid named Jerry Levitan snuck into John Lennon's hotel room with a reel-to-reel tape recorder and somehow convinced the Beatle/activist/music god to give him an interview. Holy crap, right? That kid's got something to talk about for the rest of his life. But rather than rest on those fantastic laurels, Jerry grows up and produces a poetic animated short with the interview as the audio track. It's like SNL's "Fun With Real Audio", but way, way cooler. The animation mostly consists of pencil-type drawings that illustrate Lennon's words; sometimes humorously, sometimes poignantly, but always reverently. And the greatest thing about this film: forty years later it's still completely relevant. Turn on CNN right this minute, and you can apply John Lennon's observations on war, peace, and the ultimate futility of revolution. Please, please, please let this one win.

Peter and the Wolf - UK/Poland
I grew up loving this classic work by Prokofiev. My mom was a classical music buff, and she jumped at the chance to present this piece to my sister and I as a way to teach us about the different instruments in the orchestra. Most of the time, in fact, when Peter and the Wolf has been produced, it has been narrated for children, as an introduction to classical music. Personally, I was always enraptured by the story of a boy, his pet goose, a bird, a cat, a grandfather, and the Big Bad Wolf. This new production, however, goes much darker. We still have the basics of the story: Peter sneaks out of the gate into the forest and plays with his animal friends; the wolf attacks; and Peter and his grandfather are ultimately victorious over the predator. Before all that, though, the film introduces us to Peter's hometown: a dirty, decaying industrial hole, crawling with bullies and miscreants. While Peter and the birds are playing, the cat and wolf mirror the human antagonists. Most strikingly, the film does not shy away from the darkest elements of the story, which have traditionally been whitewashed by Disney and other producers. This was probably the most well-rounded of the shorts, with moments of humor, suspense, and horror all blended in a modern update of the classic tale.

OK, if you made it through that whole write-up, you know who I want to win. For creativity, uniqueness, and sheer pluck, I Met the Walrus needs to take home the little gold man. Of course, Even Pigeons easily has the most mass appeal in this category (but when does Oscar ever reward mass appeal?) On the other hand, if Academy voters are going for technical impressiveness, Madame Tutli-Putli or My Love could take the cake. I suspect, however, that we'll see Suzie Templeton and Hugh Welchman climb those steps for Peter and the Wolf: it's got a great pedigree, and it's a gritty take on a classic tale. The Academy will eat that right up. ...Click here for the rest of this tasty post.

Looks like it's week two in a Minnesota movie dry spell. There is nothing premiering in the theaters that interests me in the slightest (except for Nanking, which looks pretty cool). Captain Crash saw Rambo and said it was great, but my dear roomie and I often differ on what makes great cinema. (No chick flicks for him, no dick flicks for me).

I got No End In Sight from Netflix, though, so maybe the weekend won't be a total waste... but I'm kind of tired of staying in. (Now that the temperature has finally risen above zero, it's relatively safe to venture out). Oh, well.

I am counting the days until February 15, when I get to see all the Oscar-nominated short films. They're showing at the Lagoon. Yippee!

Until then, I'm going to try to exercise patience. ...Click here for the rest of this tasty post.

As Leif Pettersen aptly observed, it was cold as balls in Minnesota this weekend. So Captain Crash and I had big plans to see Cloverfield and 27 Dresses on Saturday... it didn't happen. We stayed cloistered in the apartment. We're going to catch them tonight, though.


We did see Persepolis on Friday night. I was really anticipating this one... an animated adaptation of Marjane Satrapi's autobiographical graphic novel. It was... lovely. And sad. And funny.

I don't know how to describe the feelings that the film stirred up in me. The child was so hopeful, and full of joie de vivre... as she grew up and experienced loss after heartbreak after rejection, she became disillusioned. As I stood up at the end of the movie, I felt very sad... but as I think of it now, I don't think I was upset by any of the film's specific events as much as by the fact that this girl lost much of her hope and idealism. Even as a privileged child of the free world, I clearly saw my own growing-up experiences reflected in that.

And, hey... Captain Crash loved it--even though it was all in French! That really says something.

Incidentally, can I just say.... I love the Uptown Theatre! The bathrooms are super-cute.